Just don't even read this. It's a waste of your time.

I want to give up because I know I'm lazy and it's pathetic.
I can't handle stress.

You know what? She's right. I'm immature. If I can't make time to sit at home and just study for half an hour, then how am I helping myself? Yes, I'm embarassed from this. I guess I'm going crazy because we were coming home from my uncle's birthday and I was sleeping in the car and wake up to the word "grades." When I go to my room my mom asks me if I made honors. My total grade is an 89 (which is pretty bad thanks to math).

So I'm at rock bottom. I'm not exactly at the same level as I was two years ago, but I still feel shitty.

I think it's great how people can be motivated to change. I'd like to be motivated. Obviously self-motivation doesn't work, and when it does, it works for a few hours. It's 12:16 in the morning and I can't fall asleep after this.

i'm gonna go clean.

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